Emilia-Romagna, Italy
Welcome to the second part of my post about one day in Bologna. If you have missed the first juicy part about dead bodies, prostitutes and a man with a nose in his hand, check Part 1 . And I continue from where I left...
Why Is Bologna Even Red?
Bologna has 4 nicknames, and once you hear them, the city starts making sense.
- La Dotta — the learned one. This is main obvious one. Bologna hosts the first university that's been here since before most countries existed.
- La Grassa — the fat one. This city feeds you like it is preparing you for winter which you will spend outside Arctic Circle and 3 generations of hunger. Tagliatelle al ragù .... mama mia... the tasties invention ever.
- La Rossa — the red one. Because of the terracotta, brick, and clay tones that colour literally everything. Also because of its strong left-wing political history. Bologna has always had opinions and has never been quiet about them.
- La Turrita — the towered one. Medieval Bologna was once full of towers, built by powerful families as status symbols and defensive structures. At its peak, the city had around 180 towers. Today 2 survive as symbols: Asinelli (the taller one) and Garisenda (the shorter one with the stronger lean).
I know this sounds very niche. But once you understand the nicknames, you stop looking at Bologna as "another pretty Italian city" and start understanding it as a city with meanings, appetite, and a slight talent for being a drama-queen at its best.
The Naughty Finger of The Neptune
From the university area, I continued toward Piazza Maggiore and Piazza del Nettuno, where Neptune stands in the middle of Bologna like someone from Marvel movie accidentally landed in the 16th century.
The Fountain of Neptune was created by Giambologna in the 1500s and commemorated to celebrate the election of Pope Pius IV. Officially, Neptune symbolizes power, control, and papal authority. Unofficially, Bologna decided to make the story more entertaining.
The statue is gorgeous with strong body, dramatic pose, perfect details. Well... I can't agree more. And here it comes the legend.
Apparently, church authorities found the Neptune statue to be indecent and asked the sculptor to minimize the proportions. Giambologna, being creative and possibly slightly cheeky, adjusted the statue to Popes wish but gave Bologna one of its famous optical illusions. If you stand at the right angle behind the statue, Neptune’s outstretched left hand thumb appears to become something else. Let’s just say, not a thumb anymore but an erected male genital's which fits perfectly for a masculine Neptune naked torso.
Only in Italy can papal authority, Renaissance sculpture, and a penis joke survive together for centuries.
Beauty Will Safe The World Or Not?
Bologna also has another legend I love: the 3 arrows in Corte Isolani on Strada Maggiore.
The story goes that a jealous husband hired archers to kill his wife, or in some versions her lover. Apparently the woman was at home living on the upper floor just above the porticoes while hundred of archers were standing outside her home ready to kill the woman. Just as they were ready to shoot, the woman appeared at the window and... undressed completely. The archers got distracted, missed the target, and some arrows ended up stuck in the wooden ceiling, where people still try to spot them today.
Is it a court-proven historical event? Probably not. Is it a very Bologna story? Absolutely! I attached the picture with the spotted arrows, so judge for yourself. A murder attempt stopped by female beauty and bad concentration. Sounds like a Hollywood drama at its best 😅👌
Bologna’s Medieval Ego Remains and Leaning
Heading further, I reached the famous 2 towers: Asinelli and Garisenda.
Imagine medieval rich people saying, “My tower is taller than yours,” because apparently rich people have always found ways to compete. The Asinelli Tower is the taller one. The Garisenda is the shorter one with the stronger lean. Both are symbols of Bologna, and they stand where important old roads entered the city.
When I visited Bologna in 2017, I climbed the Asinelli Tower, and now I am really happy I did. At the moment, the tower is under restoration and safety work, especially because of concerns around the leaning Garisenda Tower. As always in Italy, when something closes for restoration, you never really know when you will see it again. Current plans aim to stabilize Garisenda by late 2028. Put a reminder in your calendar!
The leaning is partly linked to unstable ground, and Bologna’s clay soil does not exactly help. Another possible explanation is that the medieval builders were either too ambitious or slightly optimistic. I am not saying someone was drunk, but I am saying the tower is leaning, so questions remain.
Jerusalem in Bologna
Later, I arrived at one of the most beautiful places in Bologna: the Santo Stefano complex, also known as Sette Chiese, the 7 Churches.
This is not just “a church.” It is a whole sacred complex built through different centuries, with connected chapels, courtyards, old stones, and that strange atmosphere where you feel the place is much older than your ability to understand it.
According to the most accepted theory, Saint Petronius built the complex on the ruins of a pre-existing pagan temple, with a reproduction of the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem. Later, Benedictines added more buildings between the 10th and 13th centuries. So yes, Bologna basically tried to bring a piece of Jerusalem home.
Inside the octagonal Church of the Holy Sepulchre, there is a small opening connected to the symbolic tomb where you can only crawl. I was lucky because it was open, and we were told it was one of the last days visitors could access it. Of course, I crawled inside with another guy (a complete stranger) because apparently my curiosity has no self-control.
Was there something spectacular inside? Not really. Did it feel strangely exciting to crawl into a sacred medieval reconstruction connected to the place where Christ’s body was believed to have lain? Yes, absolutely. This adventure was not on my bucket list but now it's clearly marked as "completed".
Inside the church complex, there is a special column, traditionally connected with Christ’s scourging. According to an old inscription, praying next to that column will grant 200 years of indulgence.
So, dear Italy, if you are listening (or reading this post), I would like to formally apologize for every time I had pizza with pineapple. I know it is a serious sin on Italian territory, but I prayed near the column, so hopefully I am spiritually covered for the next 200 years. Amen!
